Life of Scott

Imagination unleashed.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Pillows and Q-Tips

There are so many things worth arguing about. Some things are not. This post marks the first in what I hope will be a series of girlfriend issues. To give credit where credit is due, I am borrowing the idea from Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About, which is a fascinating site for us non-pornographic voyeurs (i.e. this site has nothing to do with upskirts and pee-cams).

Pillows on the Bed
I always sleep on my left side with my right arm wrapped around a pillow. Since Emily has been spending 3-4 nights a week at my place, I recently purchased a third pillow for my arm for when she so rudely rests her head on the second one. I saw this problem coming as soon as I bought it -- she thinks I don't like her because I have my arm on a pillow instead of on her. One time, she even hid the pillow from me. I tried to explain that she is larger than the pillow and makes my arm fall asleep, but that went over as well as you'd expect.

After a shower, I use a Q-Tip in my ear to get the water out and keep away the ear wax. There is also something called "candling" an ear to remove ear wax. This is when you take a waxed paper cone, put the pointy end in your ear, and light the big end on fire. The convection draws the wax out of your ear canal without putting sticks near your eardrum, but I have always hated flaming things in my ears.

So I grab a Q-Tip after the shower and I sometimes put one out for Emily, also. But that means sometimes I do not put one out. Here is a short play about one of those times.

Scott: I was thinking about going to the market later so I can make a stir-fry.
Emily: That sounds good. Can you get some asparagus?
Scott: I don't see why not. Then we can go to a movie.
Emily: Why didn't you get me a Q-Tip?!
Scott: ...umm...
Emily: You always get one for me. You must not like me anymore.
Scott: Why are you looking at me like that? What if I just leave the drawer open?
Emily: Why don't you just get one out for me like always?
Scott: Because it might get wet.
Emily: Then don't put it in a puddle.

Obviously, there is something about pillows and Q-Tips that goes well beyond cotton swabs and polyester fill.



Blogger Em said...

I once loved you...

11:09 AM  

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